True Confessions

Photo by Stephan Widua on Unsplash

My husband Rob is in the early days of addiction recovery and working on his "fearless moral inventory."  When I said I hadn't done my writing yet for today, he suggested I confess something. I didn't think I had anything to confess, but I have been reticent to tell people what I read just for fun.  

I read lots of theologicalish books, because it's my job to keep learning, and also because I'm curious about what I don't know, but I rarely finish those books.  I read what I need and then I move on to the next one.  But fiction I finish.  

I keep it light with romance or light mystery, sometimes both of those combined with some fantasy.  That's the case for the book I'm reading currently, Wild Irish Eyes by Tricia O'Malley. Her books are free on Kindle Unlimited, which is how I got started on her series. 

In this book, the main character Cait has the ability to read minds, something that has been a lifelong source of shame and concern, especially since her mother is convinced that Cait's ability is from the devil.  Her mother is being narrowminded and fearful, of course.  Cait discovers that she can use her gift to help people.  That's as far as I've gotten with this book, but it has me thinking about my own intuitive abilities.

In the book, Cait is tormented by everyone's thoughts until she learns to put up a mental shield.  This is something I work on as well.  I don't hear people's thoughts, but I feel their moods--their sadness or anger or joy.  It gets confusing when I'm experiencing a mood that doesn't match my own thoughts, especially in a group of people where there can be a variety of moods.  It would be easier to hear actual thoughts, in my opinion.

I do get a sense sometimes that's sort of like hearing a thought.  I've assumed that's the Holy Spirit.  It's not always clear, and I don't always pay attention.  When it is clear and I do pay attention, it can be quite helpful in navigating a situation.  Sometimes I get it wrong, though. And sometimes I just ignore it.

Is this what people sometimes call women's intuition?  Or is it like Isaiah 30:21 says:

 If you stray to the right or the left, you will hear a word that comes from behind you: “This is the way; walk in it."

Or maybe I'm secretly a Mandalorian.  "This is the way."

Nah, I don't like wearing helmets.